The first BCM 215 pitch I commented on was on the topic of controversial video games and analyzing through a post-structuralist, psychoanalytical, and textual framework. My comment contributed to the artifact by suggesting she focused on what news organizations she would be using as viewpoints from the media about controversial video games. There was also a scholarly article provided that could help add provide some evidence about the impact that violent video games have on the younger generation.
The second BCM 215 pitch I commented on was on the topic of The Sims 4 and an analysis of how players use it to replicate their own lives. My comment shared a source that could help her understanding of the impact mods have in the gaming experience, an article discussing some of the best Minecraft mods that people should play with. I also noticed how she successfully identified her target audience and how the aesthetic of her video would appeal to her target audience as well.
The third BCM 215 pitch I commented on was on the topic of sports video games, and if they could improve real life performance. Like my other comments, there was a source provided to help his understanding the impact that sports video games have on participation in real-life sports. There was also a mention that he didn’t mention his target audience in his pitch. I also suggested a way to measure his results and show progress in his project.
In terms of improvement, my comments could include more interactions with the subject materials and applying them to the digital aretfacts. The feedback could also improve by providing more actionable comments, by suggesting possible social media platforms they could advertise as well as using tags ands categories to filter their work. Reflecting and writing these comments has taught me a lot. Writing constructive comments that they could take and utilise in their digital aretfact. It was also difficult to word the sentences in a way that did not offend or seem rude to the person, while also showing areas for the person to improve their digital artefact.